The Slipper Incident

Since I post so many stories about everyone else and how ridiculous they are, I suppose it's only fair that I post a story that proves that I fit in just fine...

So, I guess it was sometime last week, I was doing normal things with the kids. Alex was mostly slowly eating things in the kitchen and Gabey was playing with all the random toys in the toy bowl in the living room. (The rule is that, with a few key exceptions like the music table, all living room toys must fit in the bowl, or else there are too many toys in the living room. This is hopefully just a temporary situation until Gabey doesn't really need the constant entertainment of toys in every single room. Because, though I refuse to ban the kids from any room in the house, I can also see a future where I can vacuum the living room without relocating the Tyrannosaurus, ten cars and a couple giant pipe cleaners.) Gabey was chewing on a pretend chocolate bar, likely fantasizing about a real one since the need for chocolate is a dominant genetic trait. My slippers were on the floor near him because I had been outside and, for once, managed to put on real shoes to do so.

Some time passes, and Gabey is napping. Alex is downstairs watching a little television. I decide that it's comfortable footwear time, and go to slip on my slippers. Then, it happens. My left foot comes in contact with something not belonging to the slipper. I panic! Flinging my foot around like a sort of foot epileptic, I sent the slipper flying along with, yes, the pretend chocolate bar. I also manage to twist and contort my back so severely that I kind of threw it all out of whack.

I told Jeff the tale of terror and embarrassment, and as I was telling him I sort of realized how ridiculous it all was. I have no idea what I thought was in that slipper. I mean, really, the dreaded New England Scorpion was nesting where my left foot normally lives? In any case, my back is feeling better now, and I've vowed to never again leave the slippers out where rogue toys can fall in. Where that is I'll never know, but maybe someday a place like that will exist...